Prince Harry and Meghan Markle with their children, Princess Lilibet and Prince Archie.Photo: Netflix/Youtube
Prince Harryis focused on being the best father possible toArchie HarrisonandLilibet Diana.
The Duke of Sussex, 38, opened up about fatherhood in an intimate conversation with Dr. Gabor Maté on Saturday to discuss his memoirSpare. During the virtual book event, Maté, an expert who specializes in trauma, addiction, stress and childhood development, referenced a few passages in his book where Harry revisited times during his childhood when he wished his father King Charles and grandmotherQueen Elizabethhad been more physically affectionate. Maté asked Harry how the lack of physical contact has shaped his parenting philosophy today.
“It leaves me in the position how as a father, I have two kids of my own, making sure that I smother them with love and affection,“Prince Harrysaid, joking that he doesn’t “smother them to the point that they’re trying to get away.”
“But in the sense that I as a father feel a huge responsibility to ensure that I don’t pass on any traumas or negative experiences I’ve had,” he continued. “And that’s work, that’s putting in the work, and daily, being conscious of my behavior, of my reactions to both of my kids.
“And there are times when I catch myself in a moment when I should be smothering them with that love and in that moment, I might not be, reminding myself [to]. I wouldn’t have been as aware of it had I not done the therapy and work that I’ve done.”
Prince Harry and Lilibet.Netflix
Maté, the author ofThe Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture, asked Harry to imagine what the “impact” would be of Archie, 3, and Lilibet, 1, “not getting the hugging the way you didn’t get it.”
“I don’t know what the impact would be, but I imagine the result would be similar,” Harry said of his young son and daughter, who he shares with wifeMeghan Markle. “That’s why, again, I am grateful to have been able to change my environment, which I fully appreciate that not everyone can do, because it comes down to resource,” he continued, referencing his family’s move from the U.K. to California after he and Meghan stepped back from their royal roles in early 2020.
“To be able to change the root cause of so much of those issues, to be able to up, move, that to me, feels as though it gives me much more of a chance, and my wife, more agency as parents, to be able to bring our kids up in a way that’s really beneficial and good for them,” he said. The Duke of Sussex added that he had “an incredible childhood, elements of it, and elements of it were incredibly painful.”
PEOPLEexclusively revealedthe news of the livestream event last Friday, six weeks afterSparehit shelves. The book became an instantNew York Timesbestseller and remained at the #1 spot on theNew York TimesHardcover Nonfiction bestseller list for six consecutive weeks.
The book jacket of Prince Harry’s memoir ‘Spare’.PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE
English-language sales forSparetop more than 4 million copies with over 1.43 million units purchased on the first day it was available,makingSparethe fastest-selling nonfiction book of all time.
The week of the book’s release,Prince Harryopened up to PEOPLEabout why he decided to share his story in his own words.
“My hope has been to turn my pain into purpose, so if sharing my experience makes a positive difference in someone’s life, well, I can’t think of anything more rewarding than that,” he said.
Jenna Jones
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While the title ofSpareis a clear nod to his position in the royal family’s line of succession, Harry told PEOPLE that he’s most proud of his roles at home.
source: people.com
